Total pages in book: 166
Estimated words: 156145 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 781(@200wpm)___ 625(@250wpm)___ 520(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 156145 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 781(@200wpm)___ 625(@250wpm)___ 520(@300wpm)
Just like the man himself.
It wasn’t enough. There were too many clothes between them. She could feel his broad shoulders flexing, could test the definition of his muscles as she slid her hands down his chest, but his button-up shirt barred her from the skin-to-skin contact she craved.
Her breasts felt too tight, her nipples pebbling until they almost hurt. At least her yoga pants didn’t offer much in the way of a barrier as she rocked her hips against him. His slacks did little to hide the size of his cock, and that little movement felt deliciously good. Intoxicating. So she did it again.
Gideon dropped one hand to her hip. For one horrifying moment she thought he’d stop her—maybe tell her that grown adults did not dry hump in the middle of one’s living room—but he just urged her on. He never stopped kissing her, never stopped exploring her mouth. As if kissing was his be-all and end-all rather than just the first step to get to sex.
God, I am so messed up.
He squeezed her ass and nipped her bottom lip. “How we doing?”
“Good.” Was that her voice? She sounded like she was doing something requiring a whole lot more exertion than kissing Gideon Novak. If this is what kissing is like, am I going to survive actual sex?
Who cares? It’d be a glorious way to go.
He used his grip on her hip to pull her closer yet, lining up his cock with her clit. “And now?”
She hissed out a breath. Please don’t stop. She could come like this if they kept it up. “Really good. But—” She didn’t want to talk about it, didn’t want to do anything to make this stop, so she went in for another kiss.
Gideon tightened his hold on her hair just enough to prevent her from moving. “But?”
His insistence on honesty had seemed like a good idea at the time—how could she improve if she didn’t know what she was doing wrong?—but in practice it felt like he was stripping her bare in a way that had nothing to do with sex. She closed her eyes, because it was easier to answer when she wasn’t meeting his gaze. “Isn’t dry humping kind of juvenile?” Are you going to mock me if I orgasm from this? Maybe make a joke about cobwebs or how long it’s been for me?
His chuckle pulled at things low in her stomach. “Does this feel juvenile to you?”
“No.” It felt hotter than it should have and even a little dirty. She wanted it too much, and that was the problem. She forced herself to open her eyes and found him watching her with a contemplative expression. “What?”
“Pleasure isn’t something you can put limits on, Lucy. There isn’t a right way to go about it. Would you tell someone who was eating one of those double-chocolate-death desserts you love so much that they were eating it wrong if they did it differently than you?”
“Of course not.” She blinked. How had he possibly remembered her favorite dessert?
“Then why is this wrong?” He urged her to rock against him again. “Feels good to me. Feels good to you. No reason to overthink it.”
When Gideon put it like that, it sounded so simple. Deceptively simple. She started to ask another question but forced herself to silence it. This insecurity wasn’t her. This was the ghost of her relationship with Jeff coloring the current interaction.
Exactly what she’d been afraid would happen.
“Thank you for agreeing to this, Gideon. You didn’t have to and—”
“Lucy.” He framed her face with his big hands, preventing her from looking away. Those dark eyes were so incredibly serious. “Stop thanking me for this. The matchmaking shit? Sure. Not this. You’re crazy if you think I’m not getting something out of it—same as you. Enjoy it. Enjoy me. It’s as simple as that.”
Easier said than done. The malicious voice that had spent far too many years lurking in the back of her mind wouldn’t be silenced. Not completely. Pity fuck. She pressed her lips together. “I want to have sex now.”
“No.”
She frowned. “What?”
“No.” He sat up, forcing her to grab his shoulders to stabilize herself, and then stood, taking her with him. “You want me to teach you? Then we’re doing this on my terms. You were enjoying the hell out of this and something tripped you up.” He laid them down on his ridiculously comfortable couch. She sank into the cushions as his weight settled over her. It felt good. Right.
It scared the shit out of her.
“Gideon.”
“My terms, Lucy.” He kissed her again. Before it had been sweet, and then intense, but she hadn’t realized he was holding back until that moment. Gideon kissed her like he owned her. He took her mouth, urging her to meet him halfway.
She held back for all of one second; it was impossible to maintain distance with his very presence overwhelming her. So she let go, tangling her tongue with his. The second she did, he started to move.