Total pages in book: 59
Estimated words: 56294 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 281(@200wpm)___ 225(@250wpm)___ 188(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 56294 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 281(@200wpm)___ 225(@250wpm)___ 188(@300wpm)
“Because it changes everything between us,” he snarls. “You’re not going to think clearly when it comes to me and you.”
“There shouldn’t be a me and you anyway,” I point out.
He grits his teeth. Something like agony flits across his steely blues. “Fair point,” he says after a pause. “But you can’t expect me just to be okay with this. You can’t expect me to—”
“All I expect is for you to help me. I think we can both agree it would be bad if Paul saw this.”
I say this last part in almost a whisper, knowing there’s always the danger of Paul overhearing us, telling us to stop, ordering us to.
“Obviously,” he says, looking at me like I’m a different person, as if we haven’t kissed and shared steamy moments. “I’m going to put some discreet security on this address. Two strange letters in as many days… It’s too damn suspicious. Maybe we can catch them the next time they decide to visit.”
“Okay,” I nod. “That sounds like a plan.”
I fall silent, and he frowns at me with his eyes narrowed.
“You don’t have to look at me like that,” I tell him.
“Like what?”
“Like you feel sick just being near me.”
“If I am,” he snaps, “it’s not sick with you.”
“What, with yourself, then?”
“Can you blame me?” he says fiercely. “I’m twice your age. You’re Paul’s kid sister, and now…”
“Now what?” I hiss.
He tilts his head and almost smirks. I see the twitch in his lips like he’s going to let himself do it, but then his face gets serious. “Now I know I’ve really taken advantage of you. It’s not just the age. It’s this… this crush.” He says it like it’s an illness. “You don’t want me for me. You want me because you always have. It’s because I make up all those little moments in your childhood and all those girlish dreams. It’s wrong.”
“It would’ve been wrong if you wanted me back then,” I say, apparently forgetting why I told him this in the first place—to stop him from wanting me. “But—”
“There’s no but,” he replies, his voice lowering. He leans down, looking like he’s in pain. I get myself ready for a kiss. It’s what happens when he leans in like this usually, but then he stops, staring at me. “We have to pretend none of this ever happened.”
“Is that what you want?”
“It’s not about what I want,” he says. “It’s about what’s right. I won’t take advantage of you anymore.”
The front door opens. We both hear it deeper in the house. Kaleb quickly leaves the room before Riley can catch us. I go to the desk and close the laptop, hearing Kaleb talking with Riley in the hallway. When I go into the living room—waiting a couple of minutes so it’s not suspicious—Kaleb is sitting on the chair, holding his mug of coffee.
When Riley leaves to give Paul some medication, I say quietly, “I’m sorry.”
He’s not looking at me. It’s like he’s doing it purposefully, finding it painful to even be near me. “You don’t have to apologize,” he says. “You were just a kid. Hell, you’re not—”
“I’m not a kid anymore,” I snap before he can reference my age. “When I look at those videos or think about my crush, it all seems silly and immature. I’m not that person anymore.”
“That’s what I thought,” he says darkly. “When I returned to the West Coast and saw you for the first time, I didn’t think you were a kid anymore. Now, I can see how fucked up I’ve been, taking advantage—”
“We have to stop,” I hiss, “for Paul. It’s not right, but don’t talk about me like I can’t make my own decisions. I chose it as much as you did. It has nothing to do with the crush.”
He sighs. “Are you trying to convince me, Sophie, or yourself?”
“It’s the truth,” I say. “Just because I had a crush doesn’t mean I’m some stupid little girl anymore. I’ve done a lot of growing and maturing since then.”
“It’s been six years,” he says, massaging his forehead. “Six years ago, I was thirty-six. That’s just to put it into perspective.”
“Maybe I don’t give a damn about perspective,” I snap, struggling to figure out exactly how this has happened.
This is what I wanted, wasn’t it? I wanted him to realize we could never work. I wanted him to know we have to end things. Yet here I am, seemingly desperate to convince him he can still have me.
“Anyway,” I force myself to say, “it doesn’t matter now.”
He nods, not looking at me. It’s like he can’t. “You’re right. From now on, we have to be better.”
“We will be,” I say, having no idea if it’s true or not.
“And don’t worry. We’ll figure out who’s behind this. We’ll make them stop before Paul finds out.”