Total pages in book: 131
Estimated words: 126682 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 633(@200wpm)___ 507(@250wpm)___ 422(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 126682 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 633(@200wpm)___ 507(@250wpm)___ 422(@300wpm)
His words hurt, slicing right through me like he almost did with the blade of his knife. Yet that’s not the truth I see when I look at his actions. That’s not the hope I hold on to when I close my eyes at night and shed lonely tears with him right beside me in bed.
Swallowing back those tears that burn at the back of my eyes, I lift my chin. “You’re wrong. A man who does everything with his own self-interest in mind won’t give his life to save me and my baby.”
The statement pierces him like a sword. I see it in the way he winces as he’s forced to face the simplest of truths when all his arguments are exhausted and only his considerate behavior is left to speak for itself.
We face each other like pieces on a chess board. It’s a checkmate move. It’s playing dirty. I admit that. Pushing him into a corner to confess something I desperately need to hear isn’t honorable. But I don’t know how else to open his eyes to something he won’t allow himself to believe. Maybe he thinks it will be a betrayal of his love for Rachele. But people can love more than one person. They can get hurt and trampled and find happiness again. He lost his first love, but he’s my first love. If he gives us a chance, we can be so much more than lust and sex.
He turns away with that wounded look on his face, running away from the future we could’ve had. And I’m still thoroughly and utterly ruined, a silly, opportunistic woman who put her heart on the line in a gamble she lost.
Chapter
Twenty-Three
Saverio
* * *
Cradling Claire’s little body against my chest is one of the most profoundly beautiful moments of my life. She still raises hell with those small lungs, crying until her face goes red, but I’m determined to get this right, to do this right, because Anya did something for me. She took an incredible risk. So I want to do this for her. And because of her bravery, there may just be a future for us. Although, after that stunt, I still want to lock her up forever and keep her here where she’s safe.
“Hush, angel.” I rock Claire in my arms. “It’s all right. I’m not going to let anything happen to you. Be a sweet girl for a few more minutes, and I promise, your tummy will be full.”
“She just needs to get used to you,” Livy says behind me.
I turn to find her standing in the door frame of the nursery, wrapped up in a fluffy yellow terrycloth bathrobe with a matching turban on her head. Banana charms hang from her ears, and her feet are shoved into canary-yellow kitty-heel slippers with feather trimmings.
Claire continues to cry, but when I cup her head and let her soak up the warmth of my chest, the sorrowful bawling turns to sad sniffles, and I’ll be damned if her tears don’t break my heart.
“Anya is having a shower,” I say. “She should be done any minute.”
Livy studies me with intelligent, blue eyes. “The more time you spend with Claire, the better it will get. She can’t see very well yet, but to her, you smell and sound different from the people she knows. She needs to learn you’re one of her clan.” She adds with meaning, “It’s important. It’ll help her feel secure in her family circle.”
“Got it.” I inhale Claire’s baby scent, reveling in the miracle of the small person I hold in my arms. “I’ll try to do better.”
“Good.” Livy nods with approval. “I knew you’d come around. Anya is a great mother, but Claire will do so much better if she has a father she can depend on too, a father who loves her as much as you do already.”
I give her a half smile. “You’re a great aunt or grandmother or whatever title you prefer.”
“I’ll do anything for that little girl.”
I look down, stroking my palm over her soft, strawberry-blond hair. “So will I.”
“Then make sure she knows that.”
I pin Livy with a look. “Did you know what Anya was up to?”
She lifts her chin, making the bananas in her ears swing. “That she was going to meet Elena? Of course. I was there.”
“Livy,” I start, my nostrils flaring when I think about the danger they put themselves in. “If you ever—”
“Now’s not the time to throw threats around.” She nods at the baby I’m holding. “You need to learn to live in the moment. As long as you’re taking care of Claire, she should be your only focus.”
It’s not easy to swallow the warning I was about to make, but Livy is right. “Just make sure it doesn’t happen again.”
“I can’t do that.” She meets my gaze head-on. “Like you, I do what I believe is right. It’s called acting with integrity, and I’ll continue to do so just as I’ll continue to make my own decisions.”