Total pages in book: 150
Estimated words: 146034 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 730(@200wpm)___ 584(@250wpm)___ 487(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 146034 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 730(@200wpm)___ 584(@250wpm)___ 487(@300wpm)
He pressed my hand harder against the brand.
My palm felt singed.
I guessed it really could burn me, that horror that I felt on his behalf.
Sickness churned in my stomach. I couldn’t fully imagine the way Ezra must feel.
He continued without stopping. “I failed her, Savannah. I promised to protect her, to stick by her through thick and thin, and I failed her.”
I urged him onto his back so I could move to straddle him.
He grunted at the action.
At the nearness.
At this connection that I wasn’t sure either of us could understand.
“I’m so sorry, Ezra. I’m so sorry that you went through that. But you have to know that’s not your fault.”
“If there is one thing I could have stopped, it should have been that.”
“What happened to her?” The question croaked from my mouth.
Ezra’s laughter was hollow. “She was shot while walking across the parking lot at the bank. It was labeled a robbery gone bad, except none of that ever added up to me. It was more like a drive-by than anything else, so I’ve always known that designation was bullshit. She’d called me right before everything had gone down, begging me to answer.”
“Oh my God, Ezra.”
I’d assumed she’d been sick or there’d been a car accident or something terrible like that.
But this…
He lifted his hand and threaded his fingers into my hair where it draped down the side of my face. “I got this tattoo as a reminder of the way that I’d failed her. As a reminder of the way I’d failed my kids. Got it as a promise that I would devote myself to bringing her killers to justice. That I wouldn’t look left or right until I found revenge for her death.”
Vengeance.
That was the cloud I’d seen so many times haze over his eyes.
“More than that,” Ezra continued, “I got it so every time I looked in the mirror I’d remember I didn’t deserve to find joy for myself after I’d completely let her down.”
He let the rest hang unsaid between us.
He’d broken that promise for me.
I had no idea what to make of that.
“I don’t want to be a distraction for you.”
His hand fisted in my hair, and he dragged me closer to him, breath to breath as he murmured, “Too late, Little Trespasser.”
Then he kissed me again.
THIRTY-THREE
EZRA
Darkness drifted through Savannah’s room, and I kept fluttering my fingers through her hair as we both lay there absorbing everything that had happened between us.
The way I’d touched her and she’d touched me.
Both physically and emotionally.
The confession I’d made about Brianna that I had then sealed with a kiss.
A slow, deep, desperate kiss before I’d nudged Savannah off me and curled her back into my arms, just needing to have the perfect weight of her against me.
I felt like a thousand pounds of shame and grief had been expelled. Present and lingering, but not quite as heavy. Through it, I waited for the guilt to come. For it to hit like another strike of betrayal, confessing Brianna’s secret that I’d held for so long.
I’d always felt like I needed to carry it on as some sort of tribute to her name. Hold the piece I should have protected.
Because I’d failed her.
I’d failed so reprehensibly and shamefully, and it’d caused a lifetime of pain and loss for my kids.
I hadn’t listened when she’d begged for help. Had turned my back when she’d needed me most.
I wouldn’t fail on the last promise I’d made to her when I’d stood over her grave. I would find those responsible. Bring them to justice. Whatever it required.
Tonight, that thirst for vengeance still soaked me through, but it was different, lying here with Savannah like this.
I shouldn’t find so much comfort in it, her being here, not when she kept promising again and again she was going to leave. When I knew there was something going on with her. When I knew she was keeping her own secrets.
But there was no putting out the glow that burned in the center of me. A spark in the place where the little trespasser had gotten.
Savannah and I were on our sides facing each other, our breaths mingling in the space that separated us, those aqua eyes swimming with care as she continued to gently trace her fingers over the tattoo like she could assuage the pain.
I took that hand and pressed her knuckles to my lips.
Every rational part of me was aware that I should get up and leave. I was getting attached, and I had no doubt that my kids were, too.
The greedy part of me said fuck it.
I was going to stay.
“What are you hiding from?” I finally whispered into the lapping shadows. Couldn’t shake how badly I wanted to know her. Understand her.
Savannah flinched where I held her in my arms. I’d already known she would. Had known she’d fight to keep herself shored up and camouflaged. But there was no not seeing her. Not when she was nothing but a beacon.