Total pages in book: 43
Estimated words: 41935 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 210(@200wpm)___ 168(@250wpm)___ 140(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 41935 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 210(@200wpm)___ 168(@250wpm)___ 140(@300wpm)
Sunny California is a welcome change from the Drakensberg Mountains in South Africa, where Farrah was filming a movie until it wrapped six days ago. We had to watch out for leopards there, and I couldn’t get the chai tea lattes I’m semidependent on.
When I reach the Bronco, I text my mom.
Alice: Hey, how is he today? And how are you?
I know she won’t respond immediately, so I tuck my phone into my bag. I tie my dark shoulder-length hair back into a ponytail so I can enjoy the ride without hair in my face. Then I take the car’s top down and look for a local sushi place on my phone.
There’s one that looks good about five miles away. I start my drive, admiring the modern, sprawling mansions around me. They’re all set far back from the road, landscaping and trees used to create privacy. This is exactly the kind of neighborhood people would drive through just to check out the houses--if they could.
But it’s gated. I had to submit my driver’s license and get a background check just to be able to come in. Farrah’s face gets her into places like this. She just smiles and waves and is immediately recognized as one of the most famous actresses in the world.
I don’t resent it. Being recognized and approached everywhere sounds terrible to me. I’m lucky--I get to experience a lot of things alongside Farrah, but I don’t have to deal with being the famous person myself.
Experiences like hiking in the Drakensberg Mountains which was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. My parents were floored when I FaceTimed them so they could see a vervet monkey in a tree one day, so close I could make out the tiniest details of its face.
I’ve also been sailing on mega yachts, had dinner at the Eiffel Tower, and skydived. Being Farrah’s assistant is exhausting at times, but it’s never boring.
Parking is impossible near the sushi place, so I end up walking a couple of blocks. When I step inside, there are people waiting for their orders, but no one is in line to place an order.
I smile at the guy behind the counter.
“What can I get you?” he asks.
“Is your tuna sashimi grade?”
“Yes. Yellowfin.”
“Great. I’ll take a tuna roll, please. No sauce, wasabi or ginger, not even on the side. And I only want two pieces of the roll in the container. And no Styrofoam. You can put it in a paper cup if you need to.”
He lowers his brows, clearly questioning my sanity. I’m used to it.
“Only two pieces?” He gestures to a case of already-prepared individual pieces of sushi.
I shake my head. “No, I need it freshly made, please. I’ll pay for the entire roll, but I only want two pieces.”
He shrugs. A guy in line shoots me a judgmental glance, probably over Farrah’s neurotic sushi order.
Having an entire roll in the container is too tempting, she says. She finds two pieces “satisfying”. But if I get an entire roll so she can save some for later, it doesn’t feel like a real meal to her.
That’s because two pieces of sushi aren’t a meal, but I don’t argue with her. She’s expected to look perfect and that creates a lot of pressure.
Once I have the sushi, it takes me almost thirty minutes to get to Whole Foods, with traffic getting heavier as it gets later. I know Whole Foods sells Voss water, though, and that’s the only kind Farrah drinks. I pick up two dozen large glass bottles of it and the store’s entire stock of organic lemons and dried lavender.
When I get back to the beach house, I’ll prepare enough waters to last Farrah today and tomorrow. That’ll take all the lemons I bought because I slice up three for every water and add in a couple sprigs of lavender.
Hopefully I can hit up a farmers’ market tomorrow when she’s working and get more lemons.
I check my phone before leaving the Whole Foods parking lot and see that Farrah has texted me three times.
Farrah: Sushi???
Farrah: Wilting away here...
Farrah: the show’s MUA asked if she can pluck my brows!! Can you even?? I don’t even know you, rando MUA, but sure, go ahead and potentially ruin my entire face...
I shake my head, smiling at her overly dramatic reaction, and text back.
Alice: Whole Foods was a long drive. Heading back to the house now.
Farrah: Okay, hurry.
Farrah: I saw JP!! His smile made my ovaries quiver. Sooo glad you taught me that football stuff!
I set my phone down without responding because traffic is looking nightmarish at this point and I don’t want to waste any time.
When Farrah’s agent told her who the other contestants on the show were, she immediately decided to end up with JP Covington, a pro football quarterback. I made her study guides about the game and quizzed her for hours until she had it down. Then we started watching old games and I explained things to her and then made her explain things to me.