Total pages in book: 139
Estimated words: 131137 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 656(@200wpm)___ 525(@250wpm)___ 437(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 131137 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 656(@200wpm)___ 525(@250wpm)___ 437(@300wpm)
When his eyes took on a faraway quality, she prodded, “Nick?”
His focus returned to her. “I shifted. My wolf was too enraged to hold back, and I didn’t want him to. They were going to hurt her anyway, so obeying them seemed pointless. I killed the kid who’d tried to rape her, and I badly maimed two of the others. The fourth human ran off and got help.” He waited for disgust to contort her expression, or for fear to enter her eyes. But she said nothing, and her expression remained blank.
Hopeful, he continued. “I might have been executed rather than sent to juvie, but the video clearly showed what the humans’ intentions had been, and that it was self-defense. Still, I was thirteen and I’d killed a human and maimed two others on my own. The human authorities were nervous about it. I think they thought the likelihood was that I wouldn’t get out of juvie alive, so problem solved.”
“But you did get out.” And she was proud of him for that. How could he have thought she’d judge him for doing what most shifters would have done in his situation? Hell, Trey’s wolf went feral pretty often.
“I quickly realized that the guards were being paid to target certain shifters—most likely by relatives of the humans who’d been hurt at the shifter’s hands. So I encouraged all the shifters in the place to band together into one pack rather than existing in small groups. It gave us more protection. While each one of us always had someone looking out for them, it made it extremely hard for the guards to target anybody.”
“And you were their leader, their Alpha,” she easily guessed. He was a natural leader. He truly was born to be an Alpha…and yet he’d left that position behind for her. The question was for how long?
“At first, no. Another wolf acted as Alpha, but the other shifters didn’t really follow Merrick. They just didn’t want to challenge him, didn’t want a psycho on their case. And he made everybody’s life miserable in that way that bullies do.”
“So you challenged him.”
“I killed him.” And he’d always hate himself for it. “I didn’t mean to. I really, really didn’t. But he wouldn’t submit, wouldn’t back down. He was enjoying the fight, the blood, even the pain—it was weird. Merrick was totally messed up in the head. It went too far.”
Shaya’s voice was soft, nonjudgmental. “If he wouldn’t submit, what choice did you have?”
“It’s still more blood on my hands, Shay. Like I said, Merrick was messed up…but did he really deserve to die for that? He was only fifteen years old.”
“And you were only thirteen, and you were in a life-or-death situation. You chose your own life over his. Anyone else would have done the same thing.” To her dismay, he didn’t look convinced of that; too much guilt stained his expression. “It can’t have been easy to tell me all of that. Thank you.” He simply shrugged. “How did you end up becoming Alpha of the Ryland Pack?”
“My family moved there while I was in juvie—they didn’t want to be near the bad memories. Unfortunately, it was taken over by another Alpha three years after they settled there. He was the type to rule by fear and intimidation. He punished the slightest transgressions, caused divides within the pack, isolated the weaker members, and forced many of them to fight in the underground fighting club he owned—including Eli.
“After spending nine years cooped up in that fucked-up place, my wolf wasn’t in the best frame of mind. Leaving juvie to find my family suffering like that…it knocked him over the edge. I challenged and killed the Alpha”—more blood on his hands—“but I didn’t want the position. The trouble was that no one else wanted it. The pack was a mess, and no one wanted the responsibility of fixing it. I’d killed their Alpha. I had no choice but to do what was right by them and take that position. So I did.”
Shaya could only begin to imagine how hard it must have been for him to have come straight out of juvie only to find himself suddenly Alpha of a pack. It was more or less exchanging one prison for another. Being Alpha was a huge responsibility; everyone else came first, and he always had to be strong for the pack, no matter his own problems. Nick had never had time of his own, never had a breather. Maybe this little vacation from the position would be good for him. She couldn’t allow herself to trust that this was anything more than a vacation.
“Told you it wasn’t a pretty story.”
Shaya swallowed hard. “You protected your sister. No one can blame you for that. No one can blame your wolf for turning feral at a time like that.”