Total pages in book: 102
Estimated words: 100476 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 502(@200wpm)___ 402(@250wpm)___ 335(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 100476 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 502(@200wpm)___ 402(@250wpm)___ 335(@300wpm)
Me: Did I wake you up?
Lo: When you don’t party like a rock star—pun intended—you suddenly wake up like a normal human. Pretty fucking boring if you ask me.
Me: Boring is good. Your sister probably prefers you to be boring.
Lo: No shit. Mena’s the queen of boring.
He sends me a picture of her sitting at their breakfast bar, flipping off the camera.
Me: Be nice to your sister.
Lo: She flipped me off!
I switch my camera to selfie mode, grin, and flip him off, before snapping the picture. I send it to him and stare back at the girl I’ve become.
Rehab was the best thing that could have ever happened to me. And not just to get away from the drugs, but to also learn about myself and how to cope. How to ask for help.
I’m no longer a wreck. Light shines in my eyes. My skin and hair are healthy. I smile without tears. It’s like I clawed myself out of the wreckage of the girl I used to be—changed, tougher, better. I’m scarred a little, both inside and out, but learning to stand on my own two feet again.
Lo: Mena asked if I could go straight so we could keep you. I guess I gotta take one for the team and marry the cheerleader. Does that mean I get to fuck your ass now?
He sends me stupid puppy dog emojis.
Me: If I say yes, does that mean you come to Hood River and go to school with me?
Lo: Fuck school. Your ass is pretty, but not that pretty.
Me: Dick.
Lo: Speaking of…I’m meeting my new trainer. He’s Latino. Super fucking hot, too.
Me: Don’t sleep with your trainer.
Lo: You and Mena are cockblocking assholes.
Me: Be good.
Lo: If I promise, will you FaceTime me later?
Vulnerability burns through the line.
Me: Even if you’re bad, I’ll talk to your annoying ass. Gotta go.
Lo: Bye, baby.
I smile as I shove my phone into my pocket. It’s weird not carrying a purse. I’ve always been a girly girl, but lately, I don’t care about my image like I once did. I’m fine with my new, chic haircut, a cute T-shirt, jeans, and my Docs. At least all my old friends graduated, so it’s not like they’ll question my new style.
Once I pack my bag, I sling it over my shoulder and go to find Penny since I’m not allowed to get behind the wheel for a year. Samantha was able to get me out of a lot of shit like a prison sentence, considering the fact I’d injured someone nearly fatally, but I had to have some sort of consequence for my actions.
It doesn’t wake Terrence, though.
My light mood darkens at that thought. I quickly go over what I learned in therapy, breathe deeply, and then continue forward.
“We’re going to be late, Pen,” I say, rapping on her door.
She’s completely passed out.
“Seriously. Get up, lazy.” I poke her butt with my boot. “I don’t want to be late.”
“You spend a whole year being the bad one and now we’re back to peppy you?” she groans. “Five more minutes, Alarm Clock Barbie.”
I smack her ass that’s barely covered in her thin shorts, making her howl. She tosses a pillow at me, but I dodge it, laughing. We throw stuff back and forth before she huffs in resignation. Penny isn’t like most girls. Her morning regimen is over before you blink. She takes a five-minute shower, pulls her wet hair into a high ponytail, bypasses makeup, and throws on a pair of Nike athletic pants and an orange Hood River T-shirt.
Aunt Karen and Mom are already gone this morning, so we grab PopTarts on our way out the door. Penny’s new car Dad bought her is so Penny. He’d wanted to get her an Audi, stating it saved my life when we wrecked, but Penny didn’t want any of it. We climb into her brand-new, bright orange Jeep. I try not to cringe over the fact that the doors aren’t on, so my hair is going to be a hot mess by the time we get to school, especially with what a horrible driver my sister is. She drives like a boy, crazy and fast.
She turns on some Halsey loud enough that we can’t carry on a conversation, but I don’t mind. It’s nice getting to hang out with her, even if I am having to redo my senior year. It makes me miss all the times Roux and I rode together to school. She’s graduated now, pregnant, and has a wedding to plan. It’s like she grew up and left me behind. I love her, though, and she deserves her happily ever after more than anyone. Saturday we spent all day looking at wedding dresses and she told me what she’s been up to the past year. It makes me feel horrible I abandoned her when she needed me most when everything went down with Renaldo and Kayden, but there’s nothing I can change about the past. Carrie, my therapist from rehab, made sure to remind me of that daily.