Total pages in book: 169
Estimated words: 167671 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 838(@200wpm)___ 671(@250wpm)___ 559(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 167671 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 838(@200wpm)___ 671(@250wpm)___ 559(@300wpm)
God, this woman.
She fought so goddamn hard to save herself and her little sister. She sacrificed her body and all the money in the world just to provide that girl with a little bit of safety, and I am in awe of her strength.
I would die for her, and I almost did … And still, it wouldn’t be enough to describe the depths of what I’m willing to sacrifice to walk beside her in this world.
Besides them.
Ivy
When our lips unravel, Max glances at Heath, waiting for me to turn around too so he can say what he needs to say. But I’m scared of the consequences, scared that when I do, I won’t ever be able to look away from them again.
But Max’s eyes reflect the longing in Heath’s eyes and all the terrible regrets.
Finally, I turn to look at him, and the agony in his eyes is almost too much to take. “Heath …”
He instantly drops to his knees. “I’m sorry.” His nails dig into his knees. “I’m sorry for ever doubting you, for buying drugs from Ivan, for trusting him instead of you, for not believing you when I should have, for punishing you by taking your body, and for not giving you all the money you needed to save Cora and yourself. I don’t fucking deserve your forgiveness … but I will beg for the rest of my life that you do. Because I cannot live without you. Either of you.”
Fuck.
I go to my knees in front of him, interrupting his train of thought by getting on his level.
“You didn’t know,” I say, grabbing his face. “It’s not your fault.”
I wish I could’ve told them straight off the bat, but I didn’t trust them enough with the truth … and it nearly makes me want to tear up because these boys literally killed to get to me.
“If I had trusted you, you wouldn’t have gotten captured by Stefano, and Max wouldn’t have been shot,” he continues. “And your mother would still be alive.”
Max sinks to the floor too, despite the half-healed wounds on his back, and he wraps his arms around Heath. “Stop. This is not your fault. Stefano caused all of this. Stop letting the guilt eat you alive.”
“He’s right,” I say.
“This is why you needed those ketamine pills, didn’t you?” Max asks him.
Heath nods, but he can’t even look us in the eyes. “They gave me a means to escape my own emotions, because it was easier to deny them than to feel like the world was caving in on me,” he says. “To feel like I was being crushed by the weight of my own fucking love for the people close to me. And I failed you both.”
Those pills allowed him to hide, to exist without feelings, to lull the dull ache living in the corners of his heart. He wanted to be loved so badly, and no one ever noticed.
I hug him even tighter, feeling overwhelmed by how much he’s kept buried.
“It’s okay,” I say. “You made a mistake, and you fixed it.”
“I didn’t fix shit. Max did. He gave you an escape,” he says through gritted teeth.
I grab his face to make him look at me. “And you came back for me. Even when you were the only one left standing, you came to my aid. You protected me with your life.”
He lets my words sink in for a moment. I can see it in his eyes.
“I wanted to save you and Cora. No matter if it cost me my life. I needed you to be safe,” he says. “I needed you …” He doesn’t finish his sentence.
Doesn’t finish the thought because that’s just it.
This is the end of it.
This is what he’s been wanting to say to both of us.
“I love you,” he murmurs.
“What?” I mutter, leaning back.
He stares into my eyes, almost as if he wants to drown in them. “Even if you don’t want me anymore. I will fight for you.”
Part of me wants to push back, pull away, and run.
But another part of me desperately wants to return to whatever it was that we had when we were together. All four of us.
And I don’t want to lose that either.
Sudden clapping has us all looking up. “Wow, what a sappy love story.”
We all get up off the floor now that he’s here to judge us.
“Silas,” Max says with an annoyed look on his face. “Glad to see you’re back up and running.”
“Who said anything about running?” Silas retorts, limping closer. “That’ll take a few more days.”
“You sound like you’re back to your old snarky self.” Heath clears his throat. “I almost missed it.”
“Almost?” A filthy smirk forms on his face. “Aw, you wanted me dead instead?”
“Of course not,” Heath retorts.
“You were knifed in the leg, not the heart. Don’t exaggerate,” Max says.