Total pages in book: 101
Estimated words: 97229 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 486(@200wpm)___ 389(@250wpm)___ 324(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 97229 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 486(@200wpm)___ 389(@250wpm)___ 324(@300wpm)
“You’re not insane and you’re not in a coma,” Hans said, “How about you go finish your merlot and we’ll resume the conversation when you’re a little calmer?”
I stared at him in shock, because he sounded like all this was the most natural thing in the world. Like it should be obvious that these entities existed and I should have known all about them.
“I am surprised you don’t know about them, yes,” he said.
His tone changed and he cursed under his breath.
“Your mother and grandmother did a very good job at hiding the truth from you, didn’t they?”
Stupid girl.
Even now his eyes were so green they were mesmerising. I tried to focus on them and not the world that was twisting and warping around me.
I took a deep breath, and tried to still the inner whirlwind. There was no point in denying it. My rational beliefs were crumbling to nothing, and there was nothing I could do about it.
I sighed to myself, my hands still gripped in Hans’. He stayed as calm as ever while my mind lurched through my memories.
Maybe I should have fought an awful lot harder in the first place. Every time Mum and Grandma told me I was bloody insane…
“Don’t beat yourself up,” Hans said. “You were just a child. You’re blossoming into a very skilled woman right now. You should be proud of yourself.”
“What am I?” I asked again. “Seriously, just tell me, will you?”
His gaze was so intense it took my breath.
“I’ve said it before, but I’ll say it again. Make sure you only ask questions when you’re ready to hear the answers. Once you’ve heard them, you can’t go back.” He paused. “So, I’m asking you. Do you really want to know?”
Yes. That’s what I thought in an instant. YES, OF COURSE I WANT TO KNOW.
Hans spoke again.
“Be sure, little one. Be very, very sure.”
I could sense the trapdoor, thumping in my subconscious, and it gave me its usual shiver of NO.
NO.
DON’T DO IT!
Don’t ask the question.
But I couldn’t fight it anymore. I couldn’t walk out of the bathroom with no idea what the fuck was happening to me, or who the fuck I really was…
I sounded surprisingly self-assured when I spoke next.
“Yes,” I told him. “I want to know. So, I’m asking you again. What the hell am I? A psychic, a ghost whisper, or a goddamn witch, Hans?”
He sighed, and gave my hands another squeeze before he answered me.
“You’re all three,” he said.
Chapter Nineteen
Rational Katherine came back with a second wind, trying to bash stupid fairy tale girl into oblivion. A psychic, a ghost whisperer, and a witch? Just how? What? This was just plain crazy…
Hans interjected my thoughts.
“Feeling not thinking, remember? Throw the clockwork thoughts out of the window, and let your intuition guide you.”
I must have been open-mouthed. The battle was still raging inside me.
Hans read it in an instant.
“It’s interesting don’t you think? How you are coping so well with the supernatural elements of the people around you, but not of the ones in yourself?”
“I’m not sure I’m coping so well with anything,” I told him.
“That’s not true, sweetheart. You’re coping extremely well with everything. It’s an awful lot to comprehend.”
Sweetheart.
My sweetheart was a vampire. A bisexual, murdering, vampire. A stunningly handsome vampire with a monster cock. And I was his witch. I wasn’t sure whether my cackling laugh was aloud or in my head.
He pulled me into his arms and kissed my forehead.
“I ask you again,” Hans said. “Do you not think it’s interesting how you can accept the supernatural elements around you, but not within you?”
I heard my grandma’s screeching voice in my head. STUPID GIRL! STOP IT WITH THE DAYDREAMING!
Memories came back like a typhoon, running savage through my mind.
A teddy cat when I was a young girl, given to me by one of our neighbours. Me convinced he was a familiar called Goblin, and casting pretend spells with him, using one of Mum’s big cooking pots as a cauldron. She’d gone ballistic and thrown him out with the trash. STOP IT, KATHERINE! NO GAMES ABOUT WITCHES!
Me telling Mum about my dream where Grandma had a nasty fall in church at the harvest festival, later that week. Please make sure she’s safe, I said. I don’t want her to hurt herself!
STOP IT, KATHERINE! I DON’T WANT TO HEAR ABOUT ANY MORE OF YOUR STUPID DREAMS! THEY AREN’T REAL!
I’d been right, though. Grandma had tumbled and knocked herself out on one of the pews.
“That’s why you haven’t realised,” Hans said softly against my ear. “You’ve been told you’re crazy for feeling the truth of things, ever since the day you were born.”
“But how can it be like this?” I asked.
“It doesn’t matter how. All that matters is that you are. Embrace it, Katherine. Let go of the fight and accept who you truly are.”